So in thinking about my life I couldn't help but wonder if I would want to be in Erica's shoes. I wondered if I would want that chance. The I asked myself if I was ok with my past as is. The answer I came up with to that question was yes. Although there is one moment in time I have regretted for many years.
It was the moment the Paul walked out the door the morning of his accident. The last moment I saw him alive. We had a fight that morning. Nothing major, just a stupid quibble however it was enough to make both of us forget to say "I love you". I took for granted that I would see him later that day. And for years after I wished I had told him I loved him before he walked out the door. Fifteen years later that regret has eased and I realize that he did know how much I loved him because I told him all the time. But these days before my husband Lou leaves the house I always say "I love you". And I always live with a little fear deep inside that it could be the last time.
I try hard to not live with regrets. I try to remember that the past is over and the future is uncertain but what is most important is to live in the moment. And most of the time I talk a good game because that is the hardest part for me. I watch my dog and realize how for him life is about moments and nothing more. All he longs for is to laze around, go for walks outside, to lay in the sun, to eat, and to lay in our laps at nite. I wish I could be more like him in that sense. Just be in the moment. And because of that he teaches me alot about life just through living his own.
Would you want a "do over"? Is there a moment in your life you wish you could change? What is your biggest regret? Have you seen the show "Being Erica"?
1 comment:
I'm going to record it, sounds interesting. I'm sure there are lots of things I could do over but at the same time even all my faults have shaped me into who I am today.
Post a Comment