Three years ago I went through a scare involving a barbaric biopsy in the MRI machine which thankfully turned out to be benign. But my anxiety reached new heights. Then 2 years ago my father died of cancer and I feared for my own life even more. Its almost like the more time I have where I don't have to go for that stuff makes it harder to go back.
I am sitting here wishing I didn't have to go for my mammo in a few days. Tuesday I will be going in for my checkup with the breast surgeon and then the mammo. I rescheduled this appointment back in March and had to wait all this time which is lunacy to me and yet I felt as if I committed a crime. Now I don't want to go at all. Yes I know I am sounding like a whiny kid. I don't want to think of my life in time to live between tests and appointments.
I need to create. I need to paint and sketch to help me with this fear. It always seems to help. So the next few days I will carve out time to do just that. Hoping it will quell some of my scanxiety. . .
What do you do to deal with scanxiety?